Cheesy Dream

I had a truly horrible dream this week. Well, two dreams actually, as I woke up halfway, went back to sleep and the story continued. I read some research which said this is very rare, but I can assure you episode two was much worse than episode one.

The plot was a typical actor’s nightmare of not being ready for a performance. In this case I was appearing in a Shakespeare play, but my costume and makeup hadn’t turned up. I sent my friend home to get it and by the time he arrived back the production was well underway.

It was him who panicked, not me, as I knew I wasn’t needed on stage for some time. Even when I opened my big trunk of makeup and found it had been chucked in the car upside-down and its contents all mixed up, I remained implacable. Don’t worry I said, the worst bit is putting on your tights when you are all hot and bothered. I knew I might get my knickers in a twist said I, so I took the precaution of putting them on before I came out.

Of course, I had forgotten to put on my Bardish hose, and I woke up in a sweat with the bed sheets tangled round my ankles.

By the second episode of my dream I had donned my greasepaint and had boldly decided to go on stage tightless. Perfectly on cue, I stepped brazenly out from the wings to discover to my horror that not only could I not remember a single line, I had absolutely no idea which play I was in! The audience and cast stared at me silently for the longest time, and then once again I found myself fully awake.

My dream was so amazingly vivid it stayed with me all day. I don’t know why I had such a nightmare, I’m nor preparing for a show and I hadn’t had anything peculiar to eat before bed. As I write this I am having my supper. Cheesy sprouts. Not the best choice for restful sleep. I’m in for a bad night.

On the other hand, in episode three I might remember where, what and who I am and end up with a standing ovation.

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