As President of Bath Whingeing Society it is my duty to bring you our Spring/Summer Update. And there certainly has been a great deal to whinge about of late.
I mean, just don’t get me going on the subject of solar litter bins!
Naturally, our transport sub-committee has been up in arms about the proposed new bus gate in Dorchester Street. Members are in a quandary. After years of moaning about congestion hereabouts, they now feel duty bound to complain about any measures that are being taken to relieve it.
Similarly, our Bath Recreation Ground Department (yes, a whole department) has had to deal with so many complaints, counter complaints, protests and ‘I know better’ proposals that it has been decided to streamline activities and simply put out a blanket whinge covering all aspects of the subject, no matter what the outcome.
A minor distraction has been the restoration of Ha’penny Bridge. We all had a really good whinge about the extended closure, and now, for goodness sake, the work has been completed ahead of schedule, which is very annoying for our members south of the river. Now they will have to revert to complaining about the delay to/very existence of the proposed Widcombe Bypass, which of course we know will increase/decrease trade in that area quite considerably.
Naturally, we have saved our ‘Open this bridge NOW!’ placards in readiness for the closure of Victoria Bridge.
Meanwhile in the city centre the improvement/desecration of the area around the Guildhall has cost BWS a lot of valuable hot air as we can’t decide if we want a wider road or wider pavements. Both, probably.
Time is moving on and we urge members to prepare whinges well in advance for Halloween (especially the many nutty vicars in our ranks), the Christmas Market (too many or not enough Welsh housewives) and of course the Ice Rink (which we all love, but not in Queen Square, near a school or within a mile of any of our members residences. Swindon perhaps?).
Coming events include Glastonbury (backpacks on train seats etc), a rumoured protest flotilla at Pulteney weir (please wear a life vest) and of course the counter protest in the letters page (green ink as usual). What is being protested isn’t clear, but whatever it is, we’ll be there shoulder to shoulder. Whingers Unite!