Glastonbury Raffle

When I was nine I had a lovely and very vivid dream. I dreamt I was a wavy green blade of grass in a dew-soaked meadow and if I stretched high enough I could see over my fellow blades all the way to a pyramid-shaped mountain which, despite being about a mile away, was in perfect focus. Very David Cronenberg.

I saw the exact same image being used in the television coverage of this year’s Glastonbury Festival. Though it must have been filmed earlier because by the time the thousands of fans had descended on the site there wouldn’t be much grass left. just mud. Being a lump of mud would have been a completely different dream.

Seeing my amazingly prescient youthful vision on the telly made me wonder if I’m actually a distant relative of King Arthur, said to be buried round those parts. Or even of Joseph of Aramathea who is supposed to have planted the holy Glastonbury thorn. Or was it just a coincidence? What I do know is that it was probably the last time I ever felt thin and wavy!

I once worked with Natural Theatre at the Swiss equivalent of Glastonbury. It was similar to the Pilton event, though being Swiss, no mud was allowed. It was all rather tame, though there was a murder in the very orderly camp site. We mostly performed back stage which was like a town in itself, with cafes and shops just for the people who were performing. Our favourite bar was completely stocked with bottles left behind in the dressing rooms by world-famous acts who had ordered them as ‘riders’ to their contract and then not consumed them.

One top UK band had insisted on Cutty Sark whisky, a brand unheard of in Switzerland at the time. After an extensive search, a minion was flown to Heathrow to pick up a bottle from duty free. And there it was, unopened, at the back of the bar. The power of stardom!

We did actually make it onto the main stage. I had to draw from one of our famous pink suitcases the winning ticket for a round the world trip. I can’t imagine proceedings being halted at Glastonbury for a raffle, but after all, it was Switzerland.

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